On the first day of this year I declared that this year is about being seen.
Now, here we are on day 103 of this year, and what have I learned in one hundred and three days?
First, here’s what I wrote and the video I shot on 1/1/18:
For me, 2018 is about being seen. I have hidden from being fully seen because it felt safer. It was a smaller existence, sure, but at least I was safe. Being seen meant being criticized, rejected, questioned, and DISAPPROVED OF. It meant running the risk of losing love. After hiding in various ways through out my life, I’m ready to face my fear of really being out there! Witnessed. Heard. Sharing my experience, my perspective. The insulation of staying quiet and small and agreeable isn’t what I want anymore. I choose the deep inner core of self-love. I choose to face my fear and I’m willing to be surprised by what it may be like on the other side. ❤️🙌let’s do this. I look forward to being seen!!
103 days with the intention of being seen...
What has that meant? I've came out and shared my practice as a coach on public platforms like instagram and facebook and youtube. I filmed a vulnerable promotional video about me and my journey with emotional eating and body image with Lucas Dimoveo Media. I've posted content more or less consistently over the past 3 months and 13 days. I've been sharing my thoughts, my feelings, my work, my photos, and myself.
It has been scary. I've had to sit with the fear, honor it, hang out with it, and let it move through as it's ready. I've had to sit with all the thoughts that come up: all the things that I project other people must be thinking and judging about me. The knowledge that people know more about me now, and they may or may not understand me.
It's been gratifying. I've felt this lifting excitement in my heart and lungs. There's this incredible thrill when I hear how my words resonate and touch someone. Connection based on authenticity has no equal. Building my practice with people who are drawn to me, my voice, my mission fills my heart with peace. I know I'm building something that I really care about and that I am really aligned with.
Do I regret it? NO.
Will I keep doing it? YES.
Being truly seen is worth the risks and worth all the pain that I've faced. I would face it all again! And I probably will, because life seems to cycle through to the next layer of things over and over again, like a spiral.
Here's to the next 262 days of this year! I'm so curious to see how BEING SEEN continues to unfold.
If you feel like you are hiding yourself from the world, please reach out. Maybe it’s emotional weight, maybe it’s physical weight, maybe it’s both. Maybe it’s the way you feel ashamed of your body. Maybe it’s the way you feel obsessed with food. I know how painful it can be to only have food as a coping tool: because it only gives momentary relief and ultimately creates more pain.
There’s another way! The work I do goes deep into the roots of why we emotionally eat, why we carry extra weight, and why we don’t love ourselves.
I'm only accepting a few more 1:1 clients in the coming months. You can apply for an introductory session and see if I have spots available.
Much love - Always -